One year ago today my life was completely turned upside down. At an x-ray appointment to check for constipation our doctor called us with news NO parents wants to hear. Before we had a chance to leave the parking lot we heard the words that would forever change our life.
"Your son has a huge mass growing out of his kidney..." "HUH? Is a mass a tumor" "I am not sure but you need to get to Upland and have another test done right away..."
While at SACH I was still in shock about what the other doctor said... maybe they confused his slide with someone else? Maybe they THOUGHT they saw something and it isn't really there. In the middle of the ultrasound the tech came in and confirmed what our doctor had told us.
"Your son has a huge mass/tumor growing out of his right kidney. Here is the CD you need to take with you to Loma Linda." "HUH!?" "Go home and pack for the Children’s Hospital"
Once we got to Loma Linda we were admitted to the cancer ward… Ryan and I were both confused as to why they hadn’t put us in the normal ICU/PICU units. Once the nurse came in I asked her
“Does he have cancer?”
She obviously couldn’t say yes or no, but if it was a tumor then probably yes. That night we did our first sedation CT-scan and saw the results… let’s just say Ryan and I were speechless! The tumor was huge pushing all of his organs over and causing him to have trouble breathing. We were given several options, the top 2 being A- we start chemo and shrink the tumor to a smaller size then remove it, then continue chemo OR B- get the tumor out and start chemo. Well, considering Ryan and I didn’t go to medical school we asked a million questions and thank GOD for our surgeon and his confidence. He told us if it was his kid he would take it out and he was 100% positive he would get it out without damaging any other important organs/veins/arteries etc. So we went in on a Tuesday (June 14th) and Dominick had his operation Friday (June 17th.) The days in between were filled with test and more test to make sure the tumor was not attached to anything but the kidney. On June 17th Dominick went in to surgery around 10:30am and we got to see him around 7:30pm. That was probably the worst and longest day of my life. When we got the text that we could go see him the surgeon came down to get us and showed us pictures of the tumor. It was much larger than they had imagined. It was 6 inches and 2.5lbs… in a little 5 month old body! It was 10% of his body weight! They had to remove the right kidney but thankfully everything else was not attached. From that point on we waited on the results. They were thinking it was a stage 2 Wilms Tumor… when the reports came back it was a little worse. It was a stage 3 Wims Tumor. From there we got our roadmap for his recovery process. 6 months of Chemotherapy was in this little guys future. Before starting chemo, they do a standard test on the kids to make sure their body can handle it, and one test came back that his heart was not functioning well enough to start chemo. We were sent to the Cardiac ICU to start receiving medicine there and started seeing a cardiologist. Because the tumor was so large, it had been pushing on his heart, causing his heart to be enlarged and not pump as well as it should at 5 months old. His nephrologists had him already on blood pressure medicine so that was all we could do. His heart was considered a “secondary problem” which I was told would heal itself once the “primary problem” (tumor) was taken care of. Once his heart was a little stronger he was able to start chemo and was sent home right before the 4th of July. He starting losing his hair the beginning of August so Ryan and I made up our minds that we would shave it. We only shaved it that once and it never came back until recently. It was hard, but what was harder was seeing him loose his eye browns and eye lashes. We got use to seeing him like this though, and when he started to get hair, eye lashes, and eye brows we thought he looked silly! Now looking back at his pictures it makes me sad because he did look like a sick kid.
The whole 3 weeks were filled with MANY tears from Ryan and I, our family and our friends. Nobody could believe this was happening. NOBODY! Ryan and I would be fine and able to talk to everyone, then would have massive breakdowns when it was just us, looking at our baby having to go through so much. We were sent to classes on how to live with a Cancer Kid and all the things we needed to know. I was also sent to a class to learn how to give him shots at home and how to take his blood pressure. We still talk about these 3 weeks and what a nightmare it was… it was almost too horrible to be true. Many marriages are ruined in the hospital because of the stress and emotional burden it causes on a couple to have a ‘special needs’ child. I am so glad that was not our case. Ryan and I grew closer because of this and couldn’t be happier with our support system that stood behind us through everything. Ryan had friends that lived nearby that opened their home to us to shower and sleep in. We had friends that would bring us lunch and come visit, and we also had more love on FB than we could have ever imagined. I don’t know what we would have done without everyone’s support and love for Ryan and I and mostly Dominick.
People say “I don’t know how you guys did it” and “Dominick is a lucky kid to have such amazing parents” well I say “we are the lucky ones.”
Dominick has blessed our lives in more ways than I can express. I think his courage and fight has inspired many others, including Ryan and I. He has never lost his smile and charm and continues to be such a happy baby. I don’t know many babies that will hug their doctors and give high-fives to nurses who just poked him with a needle. I don’t know many babies that will run to you when you yell “medicine time” in the AM and PM and open their mouth as though it is a treat. I also don’t know many little ones that would look as cute as he did with no hair~
Even though June 14th was such a terrible day, filled with more emotions that I thought I had, it was a day that changed mine and Ryan’s life. However, today I look at my little (big) kid and you would never be able to tell what he has been through. He has finally caught up to his age group and is running and climbing like a champ. His once “chicks dig scars” scar is also healing and fading away. He is one amazing kid and we can’t imagine our life without him!
One last thing then I swear I am done… I just want to say thank you gain to everyone who has just showered us in love this past year. Whether it was visiting us, sending us a sweet message on FB, sending a quote to go in my jar I read constantly etc. It means more to Ryan and I than I could ever write down. Thanks for always keeping us on your mind and loving our little one so much!
Here are a few pictures from this past year
(June 14th at Loma Linda, June 17th the day of his surgery, July 2nd his first chemo, and July 3rd coming home!
at the chemo clinic, our baby at home, starting to get hair, and our normal looking kid!)
at the chemo clinic, our baby at home, starting to get hair, and our normal looking kid!)
